Last weekend I saw online that there was a gay lifestyle event in central London. I had no idea what it was but since we were in London anyway I thought we should stop by and check it out. It was refreshing that we found not the usual loud music, sparkles, and dating but a more routine approach to LGBT life.
This event was basically stalls with different organizations and companies that can offer services to the LGBT community including housing, children's books, holidays, hate crime services, and (most interesting to me) London Women's clinic which had information about making babies and adoption. Needless to say Lina and I got plenty of literature on the subject.
Although we're not ready to move on to that part of our life, emotionally or financially, it is something that is often on my mind. Unfortunately having a baby is much more difficult for us than the regular heterosexual couple (barring of course those with fertility issues) but it is possible, we are young, and we have choices.
Our conception choices are personal ones but I would like to touch on the fact that in things do happen for a reason. Due to circumstances beyond our control I'm living in London, UK with my partner but life surprises you in ways that you wouldn't have expected. In this instance it is that the UK laws and opportunities make it easier for lesbian couples to have a child and securing parental rights.
In 2004 the UK legalize same-sex Civil Partnerships which gives all of the same legal rights as a marriage, except being able to have the ceremony in a church, and is the reason that my partner and I are allowed to live in the UK together. In April 2009 a law went into effect (Human Fertilisation and Embryology Act 2008) which allows both mothers to be on the child's birth certificate if the parents are in a Civil Partnership or conceive within a clinic. That's great news for us because it means that we don't have to go through the extra loops of 2nd parent adoption. In addition we have the choices of going through the NHS (National Health Service), a private clinic, or conceive at home and although these processes are generally still expensive the costs are significantly lower than if we went through it in the states.
Here in the UK the law is catching up with societal needs and that is comforting at a time when the USA seems to be as stagnant on LGBT issues as ever. This is especially apparent in the areas of immigration and federal acknowledgement of same-sex rights.
Here's a few links that I found helpful in about Lesbian options around conception and parental rights. Egg sharing is also something to think about around receiving IVF in order to help another family out and make your own process more affordable.
http://www.stonewall.org.uk/documents/pregnant_pause_with_cover_2.pdf
http://www.londonwomensclinic.com/
http://www.stonewall.org.uk/at_home/parenting/2625.asp
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